Stephanie Drake

Sun, 07 Jan 2007 02:34:20 GMT

I didn't get AD.
And I'm literally heart broken.

Sun, 29 Oct 2006 17:03:22 GMT

He's gone. I had to say goodbye last night not knowing when the next hello would be. He doesn't have his car because it needs a new axyl...or whatever. Meaning he can't come down anymore for a while.

This hurts.

I hate saying goodbye.

But then I guess I'm lucky to have someone who it's so hard to say goodbye to...

Mon, 09 Oct 2006 04:04:18 GMT

I WANT THE WORLD TO KNOW THAT KRISTIN MARLOW IS AMAZING AND BEAUTIFUL AND MY FREAKING AMAZINGLY WONDERFUL FRIEND AND I LOVE HER.

Kristin. What you did today has already helped me so much.

And your prayers. AMAZING.

I'm so overwhelmed with peace.

Tue, 19 Sep 2006 20:38:57 GMT

In the center of chaos God brings us a sunset to remind us there will always be a tomorrow.

Tue, 19 Sep 2006 20:33:35 GMT

I dig my toes into the sand
The ocean looks like
A thousand diamonds strewn
Across a blue blanket
I lean against the wind
Pretend I am weightless
And in this moment
I am happy happy

I wish you were here
I wish you were here
I wish you were here
I wish you were here

I lay my head onto the sand
The sky resembles
A backlit canopy
With holes punched in it
I'm counting UFOs
I signal them with my lighter
And in this moment
I am happy happy

I wish you were here
I wish you were here
I wish you were here
I wish you were here

The world's a rollercoaster
And I am not strapped in
Maybe I should hold with care
My hands are busy in the air
Saying

I wish you were here
I wish you were here
I wish you were here
I wish you were here

Sat, 09 Sep 2006 02:11:13 GMT

Someone explain to me...

I've changed?

Apparantly.

I'm so confused lately.

It's as simple as ABC

Thu, 07 Sep 2006 03:31:06 GMT

A. I miss my friends. (Rachel Lee especially).
B. I miss J-Walk.
C. I miss my old life.

Mon, 28 Aug 2006 22:38:20 GMT

I must say.

I love Kristin Marlow.

And you praying for me last night is what's been keeping me going these last two days.

Sun, 27 Aug 2006 19:35:00 GMT

Mitchell passed away a year ago today.

I love ya kid. Wherever you are.

Thu, 24 Aug 2006 05:31:20 GMT

Ok. I officially hate my job.

Fri, 18 Aug 2006 08:05:17 GMT

My life is perfect.

My friends are perfect.
My family is perfect.
My boyfriend is perfect.

Everything is incredible right now. I have everything I could EVER ask for...

A job. A family. Friends who are so incredible that I never knew such amazing people existed. I have love and am in love with a boy so amazing that it would be impossible to dream of someone better.

My faith is amazing and it's enriched my life to a phenomenal point. Without Christ in my life...it's chaotic. I have my ups and downs, sure...

But when it comes down to it...

I'm always going to have the things and the people that are important to me in my life...

And nothing...

Not death. Not argumentation...

Nothing. Can take the people I love away from me.

They'll always be in my heart. And I'll forever love them.

I'm in an incredible mood.

My life is perfect. And nothing could possibly take it from me.

Sun, 13 Aug 2006 20:37:29 GMT

My ankles are sore. My legs are throbbing. My hands have muscle strain. And I haven't had a social life or slept since Thursday.

All signs point to...

Me working.

I love it

I love the people I work with and while my hours next week (6:30AM-12PM) suck...it's worth it because well....

I'm getting paid.

And getting work experience so that when I apply at C28 for a third time...maybe I'll have a better shot.

Ha. Yeah. I am DETERMINED to work there. I mean...after a certain point there'd be no point to working there any more. But while I'm young and in school...it's my goal.

I need to find a job that'll be flexible with my worshiping schedule. (ie. Saturdays and Thursdays) because Melt keeps scheduling me for Sat...when I have church...and Thursdays....when I have church. So...I'm going to request those days off (because I get 2 days a week off)...and see if they'll give them to me.

It'd be fun.

Wee.

But yeah. I'm happy.

Oh. And Kennedy=love.

Today he's putting a down payment on this INCREDIBLE ring. It's white gold. It has a heart shape in my birth stone (the light green kind) and it has two diamonds on either side of the heart. I was having a bad day Saturday and he had told me Friday that he was buying me something special. So he took me into the store on Sat to see it. Oh boy...it made my heart melt.

And Rachel. Is cool. We spent a lot of Thursday night talking. It was nice. I like hanging out with her. Because we dress geisha. And we are cooler than you. Best friends=happiness.

And Cala. She's the best co-worker I could ask for.

Life=good.

Eternal life=better.

:)

Sat, 12 Aug 2006 05:09:14 GMT

Work is awesome.

But if Cala didn't work with me I'd die.

I <3 you Calove.

My co-workers are realllllllllllllllly nice though and my manager rocks. My boss is a sweet man. And my owner...he's cool.

I get to answer the phone...work register...make stuff...and serve it too. I do it all.

I don't like doing this dishes though.

And that 3 days next week I work 6:30AM-12PM.

Woot.

But work is good.

I actually started Thursday. Woot.

Thu, 10 Aug 2006 21:56:18 GMT

Tomorrow is my first day at work.

4PM.

Woot.

Elise Gomez is a LIFE SAVER!

Wed, 09 Aug 2006 07:55:14 GMT

I hope you know what you said to me was hurtful.

Because you have NO idea how much I really care about my friends. How they mean everything in the world and nothing else could ever come first.

Because yes...I spend the two days a week that Kennedy has off work with him. Because he doesn't have any other time.

But you know what else?

I see my friends much more. And I'm glad I do. If you didn't notice my posts from earlier in July...where I was heartbroken because I felt my friends drifting...you'd be abliged to take a look...

Maybe then you can see...

That I was hurt...because I felt like it was you I was losing.

Don't stand there and tell me and tell my other friends that I put my boyfriend before my friends because you know that's not true.

How many times this summer have you contacted me?

Guess what...I've called you a lot...I've wanted to hang out. But the phone works both ways.

Thanks for making my birthday a pleasant event.

-This isn't aimed at one person...but a group. The thing is...when you say things...it gets back to me. And I know who's said what and whom they've said it to. All of you who have said something...I know. So you may as well just say it to me instead of making assumptions and judging my priorities behind my back.

You guys mean EVERYTHING to me.

And I can't tell you how hurt I am...

That you would even question that.

Yeah. Happy birthday to me.

Tue, 08 Aug 2006 01:41:05 GMT

Tue, 08 Aug 2006 01:34:36 GMT

</a>

Street Scene

Sun, 06 Aug 2006 06:23:53 GMT

It made me happy.

A Christian man told me I was going to hell, though. Because I was going to street scene...

Funny.

Music=Amazing.

Moshing=Pain+FREAKING AWESOME!

Oh man.

It was fun.

I want to go again.

I'll remember every moment of that day forever.

Voice Post:

Wed, 02 Aug 2006 06:19:55 GMT

I love my friends.

Tue, 01 Aug 2006 05:48:19 GMT

Movie tonight. I went with Darrel and Lauren Perkins.

We yelled random things and it echoed.

"My uterus is on fire"

=)

I love my friends.

And AJ Porter is a life saver.

Tue, 01 Aug 2006 01:30:28 GMT

Saturday was Nick's party. It was loads of fun. Yay!!!!

Afterwards, Kennedy and his co-workers Anthony and Jenna came to my house at 11 and went swimming and watched movies and talked until about 5:30AM. It was exciting. Then...I got up at 10 to call Kennedy to make sure he woke up for work. Then I slept. Then I bought a dress for my cousin's wedding which is this Saturday.

Yesterday I called Anthony and him, Kennedy, and Nick from his work and I went to Denny's. Then I climed the rock pillar thing in front of Denny's. Then we went to Kennedy's house so he could give his brother a present. Then we went to the parking lot of Harvest Church. Then to Arco. Then to the parking structure at the mall. Then to the parking lot at Target.

Kennedy and I walked to AJ's to use the water closet.

Then I went home.

Oh yeah. At Denny's and at Arco skinheads tried to pick a fight. They were scary people. At Denny's it was full on yelling back and forth between the cars because the skinheads cut US off and got mad at US. And they were mad because they asked us for drugs and we told them we don't do drugs. Then at Arco one drove by and glared evily.

Oh don't you love people?

So. That was my weekend.

Upcoming Events

Wednesday- Beach with Kennedy and his co-workers.
Friday- STREET SCENE!
Saturday- Wedding.

P.S. Anthony was playing The Lost Prophets in his car and they have become my new love.

God is REAL

Sat, 29 Jul 2006 19:52:02 GMT

Last night, I came close to losing someone close to me. If that lady hadn't left work early because she "had a feeling", she never would have stopped. He wouldn't have gotten to the hospitol.

If the guy who did it hadn't been drunk and uncordinated, he probably would have done more damage and actually penetrated the body instead of just slicing it.

Coincidence? I don't think so. God intervined and kept my brother alive.

To fill in the details...

I had fallen asleep and woke up at 11:40 to my phone ringing...it took me 20 minutes to find it. It had been Kennedy who called so I called him back about midnight and we agreed that he'd call me back in about an hour and a half. So, I figured I'd go downstairs and turn on the TV for a bit.

At 1:37 AM my house phone rang. Thinking it was one of my brother's friends I answered it as to not let it wake my parents. The lady on the other line asked to speak to my mom. When I told her she was asleep she told me I needed to wake her, that there had been an emergency with Ryan (my brother). My initial thought was that he had been arrested or gotten into some kind of trouble.

Never did I expect what she told my mom.

My brother had been at a party and had intervened with a guy hassling a girl. Him and Joey (his friend) left the party afterwards and the guy they had fought with, Corey, apparantly followed them. He jumped them as they were walking down Mission Gorge. Ryan hit him in the face and Corey pulled a knife on my brother and stabbed him in the left abdomine, where the kidney is. Luckily, it didn't penetrate...but obviously there was a lot of blood loss.

Shortly after Brenda told my mom this, the cops showed up. The expression on his face told me this was the worst part of his job. My parents and I got in the car and went to the ER and Sharp Memorial.

A man had seen what occured and stopped to take Ryan to the hospitol. But since he didn't have room for Joey, my brother didn't go because he didn't want to leave Joey behind. So, Brenda, the lady who had called stopped and called 911. She waited until both boys were safe and on the way to the hospital (Joey was ok). Then she called us. This morning my mom called her again to thank her and she told my mom that she had left work early because something was telling her she needed to head home. Thank God for that. She's what I believe to be a real hero.

Anyway, we got to the ER and my brother was pretty beat up, Joey was extremely shaken. After about 30 minutes they released Ryan and the 5 of us, Ryan, my parents, and Joey, along with his friend Tyler, headed home.

I do not give anyone but God credit for keeping Joey and Ryan safe. I do not give coincidence credit for Brenda leaving early, being able to help them. I do not give luck credit that the stab wound wasn't fatal. It was all God and I am absolutely convinced of it.

This morning (this all started around 1:30) was the most fear I have ever felt in my entire life. It was the most anger. The most hatred. The most helplessness. The most worry. I have never felt the way I did until this morning and I pray to God I never have to again. Family means everything to me and I thank God that we are all still together.

I just thought I'd share that story. Alcohol and drugs were both involved. Don't tell me that bad things don't happen under the influence or bad things only happen if you aren't responsible. My brother always swore nothing like that could ever happen to him.

My prayer is that he'll use this experience to better his life.

God is real. If he wasn't...I wonder if I'd have my brother today. But I do. Because God intervened. Angels are real, guys. And they are here to protect us. I'm absolutely convinced of it.

Thu, 27 Jul 2006 00:29:53 GMT

2 days left of summer school PE. It's been 5 1/2 weeks and I couldn't be more greatful. I met and made some cool friends...but most of the people I simply CANNOT STAND.

Oh well.

Highlights.

-Finding our friend, Bill Fredrich Conswaylo I.
-Shawn being buzzed.
-Meeting cool people like Lauren.
-Finding my official and pernament AFI buddy.
-Having a "happy buddy"
-Gaining muscle in my legs
-Bye bye love handles
-Getting a deep tan. At least where my PE clothes didn't cover.
-Katherine almost getting hit by a car.
-Hiding in a cove and sleeping for an hour and a half while everyone else played basketball.
-Asking at least 30 people for tyleonal and only 1 person giving it to me. We aren't sure it was tylenol, either.
-Calling people on walks to wake them up.
-Lifting weights and becoming "manly". Ha.
-Asking a random boy from my PE class to come to church. Haha. He came. I asked some chick too. She didn't come.
-Seeing above boy and a girl friend of mine form cute crushes. Oh. It's cute.
-Being able to tell someone (Sean Stempian/Chris Baker) off.
-Being asked to go to a party with Sean Stempian and laughing in his face.
-Watching Super Size Me and craving McDonalds.
-Sleeping between activities and roll call.
-Laughing at how some people took games like volleyball and kickball ridiculously seriously and laughing at how pathetic that is.

So. PE sucked. But. There were times when I laughed. I can't wait to get out, though. Can't wait.

Tomorrow's Thursday.

Agenda.

-School.
-Kennedy's.
-Church w/Kennedy.
-? Who knows ?

Ah. Senior year. Here we come. Like Shawn. I don't feel special. I'm glad to be almost done. And I'm terrified of leaving.

It makes sense to me. I promise. :)

Wow. I'm in a most excellent mood.

There must have been something in the pudding.

I Am Cool

Sun, 23 Jul 2006 20:19:30 GMT

Yesterday Scotty picked me up and we ventured to AJ's apartment. There we met Kennedy whom we took to his house to get stuff for comic con that he would be needing. Then we went to the beach where we met up with Barbara Balaz, Jess, AJ, and Tommy. The water was FREAKISHLY warm. It was very nice...being 12:30AM...Kennedy and I stood about shin high in the tide for a little while. By the way...the sky looked INCREDIBLE AND I SAW A SHOOTING STAR! It was seriously just...breath taking.

Then we all layed on a blanket and talked and hung out. Then I went home.

Scott had a wheel chair that was disobediant.

Oh. And. I'm the dominate one in my relationship...despite what Kennedy might tell you about being the Alpha Male...?

So.

Yes.

Yesterday=Fun.

Thank you to Scott for saving me from my lonely insanity.

Scotty is 19 today.

Um. I remember when he was 16...during Miracle Worker.

I remember when I was 16...

Ew.

My birthday is in 3 weeks. Here comes the lovely age of 18. August 9th. Day of DEATH! Well...maybe not.

Happy birthday Scotty!

Attention Emo Bashers...

Sun, 23 Jul 2006 03:31:34 GMT

Please hit me.

Because I'm emo.

It bugs me to no end.

So.

Yeah.